What do you leave in the wake of your presence?
What defines you, makes others identify you?
What is your trademark?
Since I have gone through the past few years, I have learned a lot about myself. It was a trying time for me, where my little world went spinning into chaos. After an easy and fun childhood, I had a diabetes diagnosis, loss of childhood pet, family cancer diagnosis and passing, and more, needless to say it made things a bit challenging. It is finally getting back on track, even if there are now a few things missing.
With the chaos, came a lot of reflection. Especially on life and what we leave behind with those we love. I choose to think of my mother as the best friend and guide I had through 23 years of life, even though about those last 4 years were a downward health spiral. I choose to remember her love of candles and all things horror movie related, her favorite vacation spot, helping me choose an outfit, going out together, teaching me to French braid, slowly but surely lending me her taste in all things…so many things from the tiniest memory to the largest. She was kind and loving, simple yet sophisticated, classic and beautiful. I hardly know where to begin about the things that were my mother, but they hit me in random, sudden moments. I know we would be even closer now if she was still here, when I think about who I have become I see much of her in myself.
She is not the only one though, I’d say I’m an even mix of my parents. My dad is the one who sat on my floor as I went to bed, reading me Harry Potter books until I decided to start them on my own. He’s the one who gave me my sense of humor and love of the beach. He is humorous and altruistic, generous and genuine. He is the other half of me, and I love both sides more than I can say. But I can show it, by embracing it. A reflection of myself is a reflection of them- their trademarks reside in me.
When I remember my childhood dog, Luke Skywalker, I remember his unwavering love and loyalty, his laid back personality, his miraculous frisbee skills, how he slept on my bed each night.
These things may sound like silly things, but they added up to so much more. It is the little things that I find suddenly flood my mind through mundane days, when I can’t pick an outfit or I see a frisbee. I smile a little, both happy and sad, because it is a piece of the trademark they left with me.
My trials and tribulations have encouraged me to write. That was one thing my mother and I did, we would write letters to each other. I have found it was the only way to get my thoughts out and keep my sanity. Now, I have started to find my own voice in it. I have started to find joy it. I have started to pursue it.
Perhaps my writing will be a part of my trademark. One of the many things my mom passed down to me. It is not all of who I am, I have also recently added loving wife to that list, and I will always build my trademark. but writing has become a significant piece of me.
What is a piece of your trademark?